Emotional Unavailability in Relationships and Dating | Relationship Advice [RIG Ep 004]

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In this episode, I’ll be talking about:

[0:17] Emotional Unavailability in Dating and Relationships
[11:45] What to do if someone ghosts you every time you suggest meeting up
[16:38] Why your ex sends hot and cold signals
[21:29] How to overcome shyness (vs. introversion)
[29:30] How to spot emotionally unavailable people
[33:04] How to connect with someone who is in a difficult emotional place

Today, I want to talk about the topic of emotional availability and relationship and dating.

Now, the first and most important thing to keep in mind is that you must accept the person you are with the way that you found them.

If you can’t do this, then you probably aren’t going to be very happy or satisfied with the relationship in the long run.

And it is better to let them go so that you have the space in your life to welcome someone you can love and accept exactly as they are.

Yes, of course emotionally unavailable men and women can and do change, but you shouldn’t be betting on potential or the hope that maybe someday their icy little heart will melt and they’ll suddenly give you everything you ever wanted.

After all, you might end up waiting 10 or 20 years for them to change. Is that okay with you?

Anyway, emotional unavailability is essentially about having a relationship with an ideal or a concept rather than the person that is right in front of you.

This can often appear in the form of comparing the person you’re with to an ex or to what you might think of as an ideal relationship or an ideal partner.

This can also take the form of being more invested in what you think you will get out of the relationship, such as praise and acceptance from your family or friends, fulfilling some sort of fantasy about being a “real man” or proving your ex wrong because an attractive person is dating you or interested in you, or anything else.

In order to be truly emotionally available, you have to be willing to drop all of those stories and arbitrary metrics and simply be okay to connect emotionally with the person that is right in front of you.

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